Mortal Vienna - Beethoven’s Ignored Wish
Dear Alexandre,
For quite a long time now, I wanted to write you about Ludwig Van Beethoven. I was so hesitant, because I know that I feel strongly with the story I want to tell. I went to school in Nußdorf, quite close to the house in the Probusgasse that is now one of Vienna’s Beethoven museums. We learned about him I school and I even had an LP with a story about his life, when I was little – yes, I am that old and proud of it. Of course we visited the close museum as well and I could still remember quite a bit, before I set again foot in the beautiful old building. It still looks like I remember it – a lovely place, nice to visit even when you would have no interest in the composer at all, but I bet you do 😇.
I have to confess that my story actually starts in another museum, the KHM, that had a special exhibition as I visited it with one of my museum friends. There, I read the Heiligenstädter Testament for the first time, with tears in my eyes, as I felt the weight of Beethoven’s own words on my shoulders and I realized how unfair the world as a whole seems to treat this great artist. His work is admired, his genius celebrated, but still I couldn’t help but feel the bitter taste of injustice, when I read the first lines. Please allow me to paraphrase a bit (because proper translations in foreign languages do not belong to my talents): “Oh you people who call me hostile, stubborn and misanthropic, how you wrong me ….”
I am certain, you know that picture as well, that society paints of Ludwig Van Beethoven. I heard it all the time: “Brilliant, but terribly grumpy…”; “A genius, but he hated people…”; “An unpleasant person, but what a talent!” And then I read the letter that he had written to his brothers in a time, where he thought, he might die soon and it is heartbreaking. It is the testament of a man, who suffered a lot through painful diseases as it is, and was hit by a disability he had to hide. He was a musical genius, who was terrified that his wealthy employers might find out that the virtuoso was losing his sense of hearing dramatically. Whilst we might see today what unbelievable strength and talent he had shown by composing the most beautiful music without being able to hear it, his employers might have dropped him for other composers – as there were plenty – other composers with working ears, I assume, if they had found out. His disability must have come with a pain, that would break anyone – having such a talent and then losing the most important sense for it to go on. No wonder that his letter is full of sorrow and darkness. Everybody can understand that. But what grabbed my attention and my heart so tight was his description of what the importance of hiding meant for his personal life. He describes himself as a fun-loving, chatty person, who loves to socialize. His pain of having to hide and playing the grumpy misanthrope, so no one finds him out, is palpable in every word. And I see that this act worked and the world believed him. Beethoven is unsocial, hates people, grumpy, drunk blah blah…. I see how that started, but why is this still a thing?
As I read his lines, where he begs his brothers to remember him as the people loving man he actually felt he was, the bitter taste hit me so strongly, that I felt some kind of disgust. This testament was there since his death. People read it, knew it, it was there, but society seems too much in love with the trope of the negative genius. This Yin Yang believe that something good has to come with something bad, is not a view I can share. My observations don’t match that believe. And I have to confess that it feels to me that this trope of the mad genius is some kind of weird collective envy that I can not follow. For example, I heard people claim from time to time, that someone who is intelligent has no empathy – a claim that is not only weird, but also offensive to everyone who can use logic (which is not the claimer’s strong point by the looks of it). I also can’t stand the reverse phenomenon, where people who are seen as geniuses seem to have a free pass to show bad behavior. The trope of the unpleasant genius… Beethoven does not fit in it and he despised it.
He writes further that he warded of his suicidal tendencies through the power of his art. He wanted to improve his skills further to truly master it – which is a never ending task, when it comes to art - a good goal to choose to stay alive, if you struggle with darkness. He ends with wishing his brothers will still think about him, when he is gone, and tells them he thinks that he earned this by thinking about them a lot and wishing them only the best. I guess, what moves me so is that his voice in this letter is neither subtle nor a whisper, he clearly states that he wishes that after his death the picture the world had of him should be cleared. He wanted everyone to know that he was deaf and had to hide it, he wanted everyone to know that he was not the grumpy loner he had to play. It is there in clear German, obviously ignored at least by the loudest “experts”.
There was another side of Beethoven that I didn’t know about, before I visited the museum. He loved and admired nature. He even expressed this in his thoughts about religion, where he promotes to worship god by worshipping the astounding beauty of nature. He loved his walks around Heiligenstadt, just as I love my little adventures in nature I assume – a detail that made me smile.
If you find yourself time, visit the house in the Probusgasse, you will certainly enjoy it. It is well curated and as mentioned before, the house itself is beautiful. I was very pleased about the many paintings from Nußdorf and Heiligenstadt, as this are places of my childhood. They also had a key to his coffin, which I found intriguing as you sure can guess.
I wish you all the best and I hope that you feel inspired to play a bit of Beethoven on your violin,
Enjoy the music of Vienna my friend 💫
PS: For the picture, I wanted to show Beethoven in a happier mood, as I imagine he might have enjoyed to be portrayed. With my limited drawing skills I tried to make him look inspired by a summer night full of fireflies and magic. I hope you like it.
